So how are your New Year’s resolutions going?
An occupational therapist says New Year’s resolutions are notoriously difficult to stick to, but with the right perspective and self-acceptance, it is possible to stay motivated and make progress towards your goals.
Alice Gelderblom Waddilove, an occupational therapist practising at Netcare Akeso Kenilworth mental health facility, says remaining on track requires perseverance, a healthy dose of adaptability, and the courage to accept yourself.
“Many of us make New Year’s resolutions, and often within a month or so the initial enthusiasm for self-improvement wears off and motivation begins to flag, particularly when the end goal still seems far out of our reach,” says Gelderblom Waddilove.
“Too often, people become discouraged when they feel they are not making sufficient progress towards their goals, and this can affect one’s confidence. To keep going, we need to be kind to ourselves while finding workable ways that will help us remain on track without holding ourselves to unrealistic goals. For example, if you are not sporty by nature and set yourself the goal of running a marathon, accept that this may not be achievable all at once.”
She points out that goals should be regarded as things you hope to achieve, rather than a rigid measure of achievement that supposedly reflects on your self-worth.
“You may find it necessary to adapt your goals due to circumstances beyond your control. Rather than abandoning your plans, remain flexible within your goals and find what is workable for you,” she advises.
“Here the concept of radical acceptance, an aspect of dialectical behavioural therapy [DBT] which involves reflecting on a situation as objectively as possible, can be helpful. DBT may be used alone or in combination with other treatments, either in an inpatient or outpatient setting.”
According to Gelderblom Waddilove, there is a tendency to be particularly self-critical when we are feeling low. Rather than becoming discouraged, take stock of the situation and reflect on where you find yourself now without judgement, she suggests.
“Although self-acceptance can be challenging, particularly for those experiencing certain kinds of mental health disorders, try to be fair and compassionate with yourself, focusing on the progress you have made so far towards your resolutions.”
Gelderblom Waddilove says it can be helpful to set smaller, more realistic goals that are more manageable as a series of milestones towards your ultimate goal. “Give yourself credit for completing each of these steps and celebrate the little victories you achieve along the way. If you are coping fairly well with the demands of work within your work-life balance, that in itself is no small feat.”
She says even if you experience setbacks in pursuing your goals, you should remember that all is not lost. “Part of life is to find meaning and a sense of purpose in the journey. The late photojournalist Dan Eldon aptly summed this up: ‘The journey is the destination’. While achieving your goals is wonderful, it is also important to have something to strive for, so keep setting new stimulating challenges for yourself,” Gelderblom Waddilove says.
- In the event of a psychological crisis, emergency support can be reached on 0861 435 787, 24 hours a day.
